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|dialogue= Hi, I'm BJ Smith. In my long and illustrious three year career at the top of pro football. I whooped some serious ass and got paid for it. They didn't call me death in tight pants for nothing. When you've had such a rewarding career maiming others as I have, you know how to stay fit. Through running, wrestling, stuffing 20s down panties of foxy strippers, firearm training, naval pursuit and beating the hell out of your fellow man. That's what keeps me healthy. And now, using training methods, I perfected. It's going to work for you with BJ's Fit for Football. Watch those pounds fall off. I'm down to 300 pounds using exactly the method I demonstrated on tape. I mean, who are you gonna trust to get fit? A man who can rip your arm off and beat you in, or an aerobics instructor who wouldn’t get drafted by the local hopscotch team? Hell no, BJ's Fit for Football, out now on Beta and VHS. Remember to win in a game of football, or life, you have to annihilate everything in your path in a blind rage.
|dialogue= Hi, I'm BJ Smith. In my long and illustrious three year career at the top of pro football. I whooped some serious ass and got paid for it. They didn't call me death in tight pants for nothing. When you've had such a rewarding career maiming others as I have, you know how to stay fit. Through running, wrestling, stuffing 20s down panties of foxy strippers, firearm training, naval pursuit and beating the hell out of your fellow man. That's what keeps me healthy. And now, using training methods, I perfected. It's going to work for you with BJ's Fit for Football. Watch those pounds fall off. I'm down to 300 pounds using exactly the method I demonstrated on tape. I mean, who are you gonna trust to get fit? A man who can rip your arm off and beat you in, or an aerobics instructor who wouldn’t get drafted by the local hopscotch team? Hell no, BJ's Fit for Football, out now on Beta and VHS. Remember to win in a game of football, or life, you have to annihilate everything in your path in a blind rage.
|zh= 嗨，我是BJ史密斯，曾在漫长而辉煌的职业橄榄球生涯中力克无数对手，积累了丰富的财富。我的“紧身裤死神”绰号可不是浪得虚名。如果你像我一样，在职业生涯中撞残过不少人，那你应该懂得如何保持身体健康。无论是疯狂的跑步或激烈的摔跤，或者是在夜晚将20美元钞票塞进舞女内衣，又或者是经历过激烈的枪战训练和海上追逐，甚至还包括和挚友拳脚相向，这些都是我维持健康的方法。现在，我已将这些独特的训练方式完善，并愿意与大家分享。使用我的“BJ橄榄球健身法”，你也能轻松减掉多余的体重。我亲身经历，用这些方法，我成功减重至300磅。你会相信谁能够帮助你更健康呢？是那个能轻而易举地把你摔倒的硬汉，还是那位连当地的跳房子队都不敢要的有氧运动教练？毫无疑问，必然是前者！BJ橄榄球健身法，现已推出Beta和VHS两种录像带格式。请记住，无论是在橄榄球比赛还是生活中，要取得成功，都需要在盲目愤怒的状态下将道路上的一切对手踏平。}}
|zh= 嗨，我是BJ史密斯，曾在漫长而辉煌的职业橄榄球生涯中力克无数对手，积累了丰富的财富。我的“紧身裤死神”绰号可不是浪得虚名。如果你像我一样，在职业生涯中撞残过不少人，那你应该懂得如何保持身体健康。无论是疯狂的跑步或激烈的摔跤，或者是在夜晚将20美元钞票塞进舞女内衣，又或者是经历过激烈的枪战训练和海上追逐，甚至还包括和挚友拳脚相向，这些都是我维持健康的方法。现在，我已将这些独特的训练方式完善，并愿意与大家分享。使用我的“BJ橄榄球健身法”，你也能轻松减掉多余的体重。我亲身经历，用这些方法，我成功减重至300磅。你会相信谁能够帮助你更健康呢？是那个能轻而易举地把你摔倒的硬汉，还是那位连当地的跳房子队都不敢要的有氧运动教练？毫无疑问，必然是前者！BJ橄榄球健身法，现已推出Beta和VHS两种录像带格式。请记住，无论是在橄榄球比赛还是生活中，要取得成功，都需要在盲目愤怒的状态下将道路上的一切对手踏平。}}
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